Hi all!

I’ve been away from the blogging for a bit. A number of things happened in my personal life the past few months, but I’m hoping to get things up here a bit more frequently going forward. Anyway!

The State of Things:

• Not Yet Corpses is in the query trenches to mixed response. A few requests, a maybe pile or two, and a lot of rejections so far. I’m not sure what’s next for this bad boy besides a few extra queries while I wait to hear back from a few.
• Wish I Might is still in progress, I’m in the fifth act of my redraft before I send it to some betas. Progress has stalled a bit, but I’m trying to push through to the end to get some eyes on it. Currently I kind of feel like it’s pretty accurate to my vision for it, but it’s still missing a little something.
• I’ve decided on my next project: the Dark Academia Murder Mystery stand alone (that is still not-so-secretly related to Not Yet Corpses. Magic College freshmen juggle trying to get into the Hero Guild of their dreams and solving a series of ritual murders on campus that seem to be trying to call a Devil from the grave. Still in the planning/outlining phase, but things are going well.
• Dig Two Graves will be on the back burner. Possibly writing snippets, but not the focus.
• I just had a new idea for a Gothic Horror (or as I’ve been referring to it, Mothic Horror) that is all vibes no plot at the moment, but defiantly another area to stretch my legs in creatively.

Crisis of Confidence:

I had the pleasure of being invited as a guest on the podcast The Introvert’s Social Hour, talking about confidence as a creative and the effect it really has on our ability to create art. When we recorded the episode, I was bouncing back from a confidence low point, and really hopeful for things. Now that it’s coming out, I’m back in a bit of a low point, struggling to create, questioning every choice I make, and worrying that what I’ve invested a lot of time into might not go anywhere. So hopefully I can take my own advice and work through this confidence crisis.
Stream the Introvert’s Social Hour on Spotify here:

So: Why the Crisis?

Being a writer who wants to publishing traditionally is signing up for a life full of rejection on high-investment projects. You have to develop and draft an entire novel, edit it to the best of your ability, get feedback on it (which is a struggle in and of itself), not lose hope as you try to iron out all the wrinkles, then you start querying. You have to write even more material to pitch your book, find and research agents who might be interested in your work, send them a query, and wait to hear back. Some agents respond in a few days. Some take 1-2 months. Some people have heard back 6 months later. Some agents never respond at all (this is called a Close/No Response rejection) and you have to call it yourself.

I know all this, so normally rejections are pretty easy for me to take. I read slush and I know there are times when I really like a piece but the magazine I read for doesn’t end up buying, and there are lots of excellent stories that just don’t make the cut. I’m usually the person telling other writers that the industry is really risk-averse right now, so it’s usually not a judge on craft when you get rejections.

But it is starting to wear on me. The early interest I got is starting to go stale, and I’m not sure if that means I’m still in consideration or I’m about to get CNR’d on a request for pages. Some of the agents I was somewhat hopeful for came back as rejections, and almost exclusively without personalization (where the agent mentions something specific about the book), so I have no idea if these rejections are a “close but didn’t quite make it” or a “it’s just not to my taste” or “this book is bad.”

When other people are in this crisis (because it’s not uncommon for writers, shocking), I usually give the following advice, as it’s helped me in the past:

• Take a Break from Writing: Either write something with no pressure on it, some fanfiction or a really self-indulgent personal project, and have fun with it, or take a total writing break, if that helps.
• Get Back to Reading: Again, indulge in the stories you enjoy, to remind yourself what good writing is, instead of constantly turning a critical eye to your own work.
  • If you think it’ll help, you may also consider reading one-star reviews for your favorite works, to see that even things you really enjoy don’t match everyone’s taste, and success comes from the right reader finding the right book.
  • Also, let yourself see the flaws in your favorites! This helps me battle perfectionism when it keeps me from sending queries or submissions.
• Praise Your Own Work: Often, we get stuck in the cycle of reading our work over-critically, looking to improve it. Try reading your work like you’d read the story of a friend. Suspend all the disbelief. Laugh at your own jokes. Marvel at the twists. Write yourself a five star review, or ask friends who have read it to write some for you. Remember your work is good.
• Stop Relying on External Forces to Give Your Work Value: It has value, whether 3 people read it or 3 million. Agents are looking for good work to sell it to publishers, but they don’t create the value. The value comes from your blood sweat and tears, your midnight notes on how to fix the scene, your ability to make horrible blorbos that readers will be obsessed with.

The hard part is remembering all this in the midst of things. I’m going to try taking my own advice and taking the pressure off a little. The main goal for this month is to finish Wish I Might, and focus on what I enjoy about writing when starting my next project. I am really excited to try something new, and I’ve got a few very enticing ideas to work on while taking care of my confidence to stave off the block.

How do you deal with writer’s block?
How does confidence play into your creative processes?

^{Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash}